Sunday, 26 August 2012

Sleepy echoes of carnival and clubbing

BLURGH the last few days i've been completely shattered! When i'm more lethargic than normal there's a whole lotta things I look out for to determine the cause, but this time i'm completely clueless! It's a pain, because I just dont know how to fix it. I've had massive sleeps, eating loads, not sciving on meds, but it's a mystery. All I can think of is that it might be my liver being boring and eating up all my energy, but it's never usually this devilishly hungry.

I had an echo the other day, to check my heart. I think my gastro/ endoscopy doc wanted it checked because he said if I start bleeding again, it'll be from some other place inside (he seemed to know where, mr Psychic Doc). They'll then have to do a different procedure (ie not banding the varicies), and for that will need to know how my heart and veins etc are looking. He didn't go into much detail, but it seemed a little more serious than a simple endoscopy and tying a rubber band around bleeding blood-vessels in the food pipe. Eek! I hope I won't need to find out more about this enigma, and will get my new liver before things turn even more dire...! But my heart is fine, which is good to know! That day however, my mood was not, as the silly appointment was at 9 o'clock. That day felt so long! I would think it was tea time, but it was midday. I wanted dinner, but it was like 3. It was like some annoying eternal day. I suppose this is the real world, as opposed to my sleepy nocturnal world where the majority of it is in darkness. Made a change, and actually, despite that mini-rant, quite a nice one...!

It's been CARNIVAL weekend. Yes, Notting Hill Carnival is fantastic. I, however, spent it in my garden with my book, my cat, haribo, and ginger beer, listening to the neighbours and the distant boom of sound systems and hooting horns and police helicopters. I've had some fantastic carnivals (free rum punch!), but this year I gave it a miss. Too sleepy and didn't want to get elbowed in the spleen. Yoww. Tomorrow I may venture out to the food stalls, pick up some plantain and a coconut to drink, but i'll see. (Look at how cute my Sky cat is!)

Also made a discovery! The last few months i've thought my nails looked even more clubbed (ie rounded and bulgy). Clubbing is tres common in CF, but they were never this big and nobbly! So, my new discovery is that nails can also become clubbed with liver cirrhosis - CF or no CF! I'm now hoping post transplant they'll return back to their normal only slightly clubbed selves. I know I know they're only nails, but they're getting tricky to paint haha. And kinda uglyyyy. Also noticed it's technically called 'digital clubbing', which sounds all high-tech and made me think i'm totes cool. Down with the kids YA KNOW. Fancy a forest rave? Do the robot? Maybe i'll paint them in neon colours and start a CF 'in' joke.



  1. Mmm coconut milk! I've never been to carnival because I've always been at Reading fest (...or in a three day long grump because I'm not there)! It looks amazing but nothing can top lazy days in the garden with books and cats - they're my fave! Miss you xxxx

  2. I've never been to carnival. I've never been to Notting Hill. In fact, I have never been to any carnivals OR festivals, I feel highly deprived. But to be honest I'm such a bore I'd probably prefer chilling in the garden with a good book!

    I hope your energy levels perk up! Greedy liver. I really hope you don't start bleeding again, I'm glad your heart is happy less thing to worry about aye?

    Maybe you should youtube that DJ you told me about who was on channel 4 and have a rave, maybe it will awaken you! You can rave with your neon nails, doing the MO-bot and the 'Lightening Bolt' (still not over the Olympics.) xxxx

  3. Oh so sorry to hear that your liver is zapping all your energy. I swear I used to sleep for a week straight when my liver was not playing nice. I hope yours gives you a break soon and let's go out and do something really fun. The carnival sounds so cool, I hope you got a chance to check it out.
    PS I think it's great that you are still biking. You are a total champ!