Ludicrous Bunglings: Looking Back

Happy (belated) New year! Before I launch into what this year has held for me so far (surprisingly eventful actually...!), I think i'll do a little re-cap of 2014.

January 2014 was probably the shittest start to any year i've had for s long time. Boxing day my blood sugars were obscenely high, and escalating. After a few days in the Brompton, then getting shipped up to the experts in Addenbrookes, I was told on the 2nd of Jan that my poor new pancreas was rejecting, and that i'd need to start insulin again. It was rejecting slowly, meaning that i'll gradually need to increase my insulin dose as more and more of my islet cells give up the ghost. I think I sobbed for a good 3 days, was mighty pissed off, but then realised I'd had 9 months of injection free bliss, and injecting tiny amounts will be OK. *breathe* It's OK. What absolutely fascinated me however, is that now I don't have CF related diabetes, like before, but type 1!

In march, I moved into my very own house! This move, still, fills me with so much happiness, it utterly transformed my life. My health improved, my happiness, my independence flourished, and I was just the happiest person in west london. Finally, after a year and a bit of constant coughs, colds, tightness, infection, all these niggles vanished like a ghost, and I felt like a new woman. My first housemates helped make my house a home, and also managed to bring my floundering weight up over the 50kg mark with their beyond delicious meals they would cook lovingly for me. With this weight, my health got even better, so much so a short while later I started to look for jobs - what would be my first ever proper job!

In April I landed an internship role (with the thanks to the always wonderful Sharon Brennan) at a PR company in central london. Initially I was scared about the sudden drop into long hours, lack of lie-ins, and what I knew would use a crazy amount of energy. However what I found with this working life was quite the opposite. Since I started working that april, my energy flourished, I gained muscles, I gained an appetite. Starting work was the best move, and I haven't looked back since. I was so taken aback that my energy levels would rise and not drop, and that the early starts, instead of exhausting me, would invigorate me. When I changed to 5 days a week from 3, I could feel my body bending under the weight of relentlessness, and after 5 months, my break was very very welcome. I then started at Penguin Publishers, which I still am at, and absolutely loving it. I'd love to stay in publishing.

I also managed 2 festivals that summer! I somehow survived, though looking forward I know that this summer I'll have to escape somewhere very north to avoid the sunshine. The mix of immuno supressents and my anti-fungal medication made me burn at a ridiculous rate, which thanks to said immunos, will increasingly increase my risk of cancer, which obv wouldn't be ideal... I'm thinking of re-locating to the lovely, cold, rainy and cloudy Scotland coming this May - September.

That autumn I had a series of odd leg problems - huge blisters, rashes and cuts that turned very weird. In the end it turned out I just got an insect bite, which as I don't have an immune system, caused havoc with infection and my body's reaction to it. Beginning of Novemeber I got shingles, which resuted in my first hospital admission of the year - and first ever go at home IV's! It made my chest have a it of a hissy fit, which, both the shingles and the chest infection, ive just about recovered from now. I'm still weaning off the shingles nerve pain-killers, as I accidentally stopped them immediately after a two week course and found myself with the most awful withdrawal symtoms. I say accidentally, but the Brompton seeminly forgot to tell me not to go cold turkey as you begin to act and feel like a drug addict coming off crack. I couldn't sleep (AT ALL. For 3 whole days.), was throwing up, feverish, dizzy, had the shits, and couldn't eat. I suddenly realised one nht that the only thing that had changed was me stopping the blasted pregabalin, so made an emergency trip to the Brompton hosp one saturday evening. I sometimes still get an itch actoss my tummy, however all evidence and tiredness has completely disappeared. I'm starting to realise just how crap having no immune system is.

Just before the shingles episode we went to Riga, Latvia in October - my first trip abroad since 2011! It was gorgeous (perfectly cold - no chance of sunburn!), and lovely seeing my brother, who was studying there for a term. It was probably in part why I got shingles, I found it quite exhausting.

Christmas was the first Christmas without my brother, as he stayed in Riga. Just me mum and dad! It was weird not being a 4. And for the first time ever had a fake tree - real trees carry fungus and spores and nasty things for my lungs, so we realised we definitely should. The whole Christmas season was however brilliant - I had such fun with my mates too - parties, gigs, gatherings, reunions. It was a fantastic end to a fantastic year, full of such love fun and happiness. My dad also turned 60! Woo daddy!